30 June 2016

Things I wish I could tell my 15 year old self

As you know, I turned 25 this month - hooray! 

Since that’s a grand old quarter of a century, it got me feeling some feels: partly nostalgia, some introspection, and just a dash of life assessment. 

I thought a little bit about the things I’d like to tell my fifteen year old self - anything that might have made the last decade a little easier. And as chance’d have it, I have a sister who is fifteen. Will she listen to my sage wisdom, or simply laugh at the idea I’ve actually acquired any wisdom? Let’s find out.

I’d tell myself I survived


Oh my goodness - if only I could tell my hypochondriacal teenage self that I made it to 25 in one piece. It would have relieved so many moments of panic, doubt, fear… 

In retrospect, I guess you have to live every day as though you’ve been told you’re going to survive. How else do you manage to live life to it's very fullest?


I’d tell myself to stay true to everything I loved




I remember when I was young, I wanted to write books. Or illustrate books. Or maybe be on TV. I wasn’t sure. I just knew I simply had to do something creative. But when I hit my mid-teens I stopped writing and drawing (I blame all that bloody homework) and started looking at more academic life paths. 


A meltdown in the final year of my psychology degree later, I started writing and drawing again. And the colour, sparkle and fizz returned to what had become a rather grey life. I don’t regret the choices I made though - who knows whether my life would as good as it is now if I’d done something different. I consider myself lucky to be doing what I love - never give up on your passions in life.

P.S. I don’t want to be on TV any more. My YouTube channel and Facebook interviews will suffice.


I’d tell myself to start being the person I wanted to be


I went through all the phases as a teen. There was cutesy and pink - but it didn't match my sarcastic streak. For a very short while, I was a Sk8r kid, but I only ever sat on my board- I wasn't motivated or reckless enough to actually learn. Like most teens, I had a dark and emo period - my fringe never had enough layers and my eyeliner wasn't thick enough to be cool, though. You get the idea. 

Although my sunglasses and beret phase, aged 17, (see below) is definitely a look I'd still bust out. 

But everyone changes as they get older - it's natural - and it's never too late to start being who you want to be, whatever that is. I’d love to tell myself that if you follow your passions, it’ll all work out in the end. 

This isn't just a hobby-based thing, like 'if you like art, do art', it's your personality too: if you wish you were nicer, be nicer; if you want to be braver, start standing up for yourself; if you wish you had more things to talk about, read a book. 

I’d tell myself to think “will this embarrass me in a few years?” before I put something on the internet


Honestly? I think I could do still do with a reminder of this. Thanks to the invention of Facebook Memories, I’m reminded of my statuses circa 2010, which either don't make any sense because they're full of incomprehensible in-jokes (that mean nothing to me now), or they're grumpy whinges that simply say: ‘ugh, stats coursework!’.

I’m terribly glad my social media platform of choice when I was 15, Bebo, is now caput. 

I’d tell myself to stop worrying


STOP WORRYING, YOU'RE FINE. EVERYTHING TURNS OUT FINE. EVEN STUFF THAT TECHNICALLY ISN'T FINE WILL BE FINE, BECAUSE YOU'RE STRONG AND YOU CAN GET THROUGH STUFF, OKAY?







 I’d tell myself to let go of unfriendly friends


We’ve all had friends that are mean, drain us of energy or make us feel bad. Big ole' nope to that. Life’s too short to be unhappy. Especially when it’s from your own friends. 

As you get older, you'll meet people you love dearly - who make you feel brighter, inspired, braver and happy. Those are the people to hold on to. 

I’d tell myself to grab every opportunity


If there's absolutely anything that makes you feel a spark of excitement, just go for it. That's how you discover your passions in life. 

And the only way to grasp opportunities is to get out there. Opportunity doesn't often knock while you're sitting in bed on your laptop.  




So, 15-year-old Nikki - get out there, meet people, find excitement and do stuff. Stop wasting time on MSN. 

*25-year-old Nikki guiltily closes Facebook tab*

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2 comments

  1. Can relate to this Nikki, even though it was a looong time ago for me. And, I have some cringeworthy photos, luckily taken before social media was invented! I also have a sister who is 9 years younger than me (not 10); she has always been my best friend even though she lives a long way away. Cherish yours x

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    1. Thanks Carol! My sister's actually 9 years younger than me too - she's 16 in a couple of months! :) I do hope we see some childhood/teenaged photos of you pop up on social media soon!

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